very very sad

how your world can change in a day, in an hour.

our thanksgiving day was great. kb and i spent the entire day in the kitchen cooking, taking our time, with the occasional spontaneous dance party (even the chicken joined in)..

the pies were beautiful

there were fireworks

but after dinner i went to look for my cat ishy, to give her some leftovers. i went in the bedroom where she usually hides out when there is company. i couldnt find her. i asked kb to help. we looked in the closet, in piles of clothes. and then i heard him call her name, his voice gave him away. she was lying behind the computer desk and i knew . and i pulled her out gently and she was warm but not moving. all i could say was "no, cheeters" (one of her many nick names) and "why cheeters, what happened?" over and over. and i just cried on her little ear for an hour. e made a specially designed box for her and i wrapped her in my pink robe and she stayed in the bedroom with us that night. i didnt sleep very well. she usually sleeps on my pillow half on my head. it felt so empty. see, i got ishy as a birthday present to myself in october 1988. free kitten in the paper. a couple drove her over to my basement apt in their pick up truck from their farm. she was a farm cat. for 19 years that little face has been with me. everywhere: we moved from ft. collins, co to san francisco to seattle to portland, oregon to brooklyn and finally, here in utah. friday morning all the vets were closed, i called everywhere and left frantic messages. i didnt know what to do with her now. i thought i would have her cremated. but nobody was open. i couldnt just put her in the garage until monday. ? so i found a pick axe and a couple shovels and decided to bury her in the backyard. it was very cathartic, digging at the dirt and swinging that pick axe, tearing into the ground. it had snowed that night too.

so it has been a really hard weekend. i had nothing but pure love for that cat and i miss her terribly. so much it makes me sick and i cant imagine ever not being so sad.

happy

hurray for house guests. hurray for friends willing to drive 7 hours to eat and drink with us. here are the little dears sleeping. my camera is acting strange and not focusing as sharp as it should. but that is a worry i will worry about tomorrow. for now, the task at hand is to convert this:

into a delicious meal. and below is my very handsome assistant & co-chef who will help me do it.

*not photographed are some various green things not canned or frozen.

i love thanksgiving. hope yours is happy and delicious...

last day of mossel

today is the final day of the julius mossel show here at the gallery. this has been one of my absolute favorite shows weve had. its part of the permanent collection, but hasnt been displayed in its entirety before as far as i know. ive included a few of my favorites below.

guilty conscience II

the balance of power, dated 1950-1952

balance of power, detail

prelude to eternal peace, dated 1941

penguins

tres bizarre.

freedom is not free, its still $550/mo

they have renamed my street. nobody asked me.

below is the line etch aquatint i finished last night.

i call it dog faces at the beach because i mangled their faces and 2 of them have dog snouts now. i was planning on giving them as xmas gifts, but i dont think i can. certainly not with that title. the hottie in the flowered suit is my grandmother (nanny). she was spared a snout. but is also missing eyebrows. not in real life. in real life she has 2 perfectly fine eyebrows.

did you know...

today i am 13,893.3 days old. for some reason that seems less old than 38 years (+14 days) .? i havent verified this day number, but while checking my biorhythm calculator(http://biorhythms.perbang.dk/), i was told so. by the way, my emotional state is calculated at 93%. but it feels more like 82%. i also just found out today that november is national blogger month, or something. i really missed that boat. but im going to force myself to post everyday the rest of the month. im not sure if this will be more painful to me or to you, dear reader. interesting find: this story (50,000 words)(http://www.spinelessbooks.com/gadsby/ )written completely without the letter e, which by the way, is the most commonly used letter in the english language. i really find this fascinating and clever. A work of writing that deliberately excludes particular letters is called a lipogram. i obvs dont know how to do that neat link trick that everyother blogger can do, but hopfully you can find what im talking about. feel free to skool me. cheers.